Dealing with Anxiety

I'm very much an independent woman but living with anxiety makes it a little harder. Little things, such as going to get gas or going to the mall by myself, are accomplishments in my eyes. When I start a new class I'm nervous about, I tend to feel the need to just run out of the classroom. It takes a lot, on my part, for me to just stay put and wait for class to start. However most things are not as bad as I initially think it will be.

Anytime I feel extra anxious, my legs start to feel numb. After getting out of an anxiety-inducing situation, I also tend to find it difficult to go to sleep. I hope that one day, my anxiety will dissipate and I'll be able to go about normal, every day situations like most people. Sometimes I wish more people understood about my situation, just so they could see the reasoning behind some of my actions.

I started Spring semester this Tuesday and I'm already feeling anxious. I have to try to push it away and just deal with it so I can apply to nursing colleges after this semester.

Grateful

Sometimes we just need to stop and see all of the things that we have going for ourselves. I'm so very grateful to have a wonderful family, the sweetest boyfriend, and an amazing best friend. I have such great friends that support me and that I can lean on. I'm living my life in a first world country in a house with running water and electricity. I have a job I enjoy with fun coworkers and I'm working on achieving my goals in school. It's great to think positively. I'm overwhelmed with how happy I am in life right now.

To think I used to be so depressed and suicidal a few years ago. I truly am so grateful I got to go on with my life and pushed through all of my sadness to find the peace and happiness that I have now. Yes, I still have my problems, my anxiety attacks, and all the stress I carry in hopes of a better future but sometimes you just have to push through and keep climbing the mountain even if you don't know what the view from up there looks like yet. You don't even have to force yourself to do it so fast. You can take your own time. Slowly and steadily. Just take a look at your surroundings and if the weight on your shoulders becomes too heavy a burden, you can always ask someone for help.

I've taken up running again and it feels so good and freeing to just feel like you're one with the wind. I can't wait until school frees up more so I can read more too. I just like this sense of peace I have with myself. Sometimes I'll just look up at the sky and look around me and it's just all so beautiful to me. It makes me think that sometimes its just the little things in life. The little things get us through the big things. 

Police Brutality & Zimbardo's Prison Experiment

Police brutality is in the news more and more frequently these days and one can't help but think of the eerie similarity it has with Zimbardo's Stanford Prison Experiment. Didn't Zimbardo's experiment pretty much predict that abuse of power occurs when authority is given to even seemingly normal and psychologically stable people? What about police officers that are racist and sadistic? Wouldn't that produce an even worse outcome?

Our society is so quick to victim blame. We check the victim's criminal record to as a way justify their deaths.

We need to make a change to our law enforcement. Police officers are meant to protect and serve the people. They are meant to uphold laws and regulations and not violate it themselves. We need all of our law enforcement to be like this. There are many cops that are good for our society but there are also some that  aren't that make them all look bad. They need to be more precise in teaching cops what to do in certain situations and maybe be more strict with cops that react unnecessarily violent to citizens. 

Free your mind

Free your mind from other ways of thinking. Don't take things simply as they are. Question anything  and everything. Think outside of the box. Open your minds to things different than your way of thinking. Enlighten yourselves. Pick up a book. Talk to strangers that have walked a different path than you. Travel somewhere new. Maybe you'll learn something new. About yourself. About others. About life. Open your mind to different ways of doing things. Open your heart to others that think differently than you. Don't just blindly follow the crowd. Like Albert Einstein once said, "What is right is not always popular and what is popular is not always right." Do your own research. Find and formulate your own opinion. Free yourselves from the chains of society. Learn. From everyone and everything.
           

Don't put up with anyone less than you deserve

Everyone deserves someone that treats them like a queen/king. If someone were to truly love you, they would bend over backwards trying to please you. They would do things that they don't necessarily like doing but they do it anyway because they want to make you happy. If they live far away, maybe they'd make some time out of their busy lives to drive down to see you or at least take some time to Skype you. If you live nearby but you both have super busy lives, they could take some time to surprise you with a cup of coffee.

You can't make people care. You can't make people do things. If they care, they'll find a way to show you. If they want to do something for you, they'll do it. If there's something you need or want in your relationship that you're not getting, you need to communicate it with that person. Communication is always the key to relationships. Both people need to listen to the needs of the other. If it continues to be that way, there's really not much you can do. If they want to change, they'll change. You can't change people that don't want to be changed. I think everyone can find someone that would treat them like they're the most special person in the world. Just know that there's someone out there who would treat you way better than you could ever imagine.

Of course it should be reciprocated. They deserve to be treated just as well as they treat you. You need to let that person know that you appreciate all the little and big things they do for you. Just as they should do for you. 

Florida Trip!

I'm so excited about my Florida trip with my boyfriend. We bought our plane tickets and got our seats and it's finally becoming a reality. I've been planning on going for over a year now.



I've been putting a little bit of my money into a jar for over a year. I have sooo many ones and fives but I've really saved enough for my plane ticket and a little more. You guys should try it. It really works. It's money that you don't even notice is gone because it's money that usually goes towards Taco Bell or something.

Naples, FL

Downtown Naples

Anyways, it can't come sooner. I'm looking up all these activities that I can do in Naples. They have so many fun things like paddle tours through the mangroves, swamp buggy tours, dolphin and manatee tours, water-propelled jet pack adventures, etc. Downtown Naples looks so beautiful and it looks like they have some nice museums and art centers as well. It's just going to be so nice to get away and explore new places and do different things.

Harry Potter World, Universal Studios

And of course I can't forget about Harry Potter World! I swear I'm going to spend all my money there. It's my childhood dream come true. My family went without me (the true Harry Potter fan) and they loved it even without the train being open. The train is up and fully functioning now though so I'm sure I'm going to love it even more. I'm planning on reading the series again before I go so I can get even more excited about it.

Diagon Alley, Harry Potter World